Sorry everyone (anyone?), not posted in ages.
Better bring you all up to date.

I ended up having FOUR (count 'em, four) fillings at the dentist.

Dad's motorbike remains unrecovered but he was given a motorbike by his girlfriend, that she happened to have laying around.

I'm on the Scumball rally next year! If that means nothing, check www.scumball.co.uk

So.

I bit into a chocolate bar the other day, ripped half a tooth out and then inadvertantly swallowed it. Painful doesn't quite cover it but I'm managing until my appointment at my new dentist.

I think my feet are shrinking. Honestly. I mean, I used to be a 10 and I have several pairs of Buffalo trainers which are 9.5 and I used to squeeze into, because I like them. Over the last six or seven months though, I've gradually become aware of them becoming roomier. Ruling out the possibility that all three pairs, varying between two and six years old, stretched by the same amount at the same time, that means I'm shrinking. Also, I used to take a nine in an open backed shoe (or clog) but I've just bought a new pair and I needed an eight.

Crikey. I hope that's the only part of me that's shrinking!


Oh, and while I remember, I'd like to point you at my friend Shay's blog. I warn you, it is a little bit saucy.

http://shayssexcolumn.blogspot.com/

Well, not posted for a while, so better get up to date. Went on holiday a couple of weeks ago, for a weekend in Wales. Very nice. Very agreeable.

I just tried to post a picture but it hasn't appeared to have worked. I'll try and sort that out.

We're all feeling a little better now.

Spent a nice few hours after Novel class at the pub, with a few fellow students. The best part is definitely the conversation. Very stimulating and anything but inane and trivial. It's the last class next week so I'm really going to miss that. We'll all waffle about staying in touch and swapping email addresses but we all know that we'll gradually lose touch.

What a pity.

So. My great uncle Sid dies and my dad's motorbike is stolen. Not exactly the best of times being had here.

I really hope England make it to the World Cup final. No really, I do. I don't like football and the WC doesn't interest me but it will be deserted if we get to the final. I get to wander desolate streets...won't that be cool? It'll be like a post-apocalyptic situation. I love that weird, detached sense of reality.

Is anyone else scared by 'Big Brother'?

It's like cultural conditioning. Getting us all used to the idea of cameras in homes and watching people on them.

You'll never guess what...no actually, you won't so I'd better just tell you.

I drove to work this morning and I didn't have a single car either in front or behind me, the whole way. It was only normal time for me as well, just gone twenty past six. I saw plenty of cars going the other way but nothing going my way.

A small point, but worth mentioning, I thought.

It's gone. A council lorry came and took it away. Do you know what, I kinda feel sorry for it now. Maybe it wasn't evil. Maybe it was an automotive Quasimodo. Ugly as sin but a sweet, gentle, misunderstood soul underneath.

Fare thee well Caravan...wherever you are now.

It's back!! I told you it was evil!! Not even some no-good kids can finish it off. If you see in the news that three children have gone missing in the Leicester area, it was The Caravan!! It's days may be numbered though, as the Police have been sniffing round it.

We do now another new computer so it looks like normal blog service has been restored.

The Caravan Of Doom is gone!!!...well, nearly.

A few no-good kids just pushed into "The Garages" (a bit of wasteland where there used to be garages for the street). I expect that will be 'torched' later on.

I will try to get pictures, if it is.

So, out today at a writing course. What was the highlight? That would be the first tutor, an American lady called Mystie Hood. Cute as buttons and I loved her voice.

Overall though - although I had a laugh with Maria and Keith - I came away at the end, without feeling like something had been accomplished or even imparted.

Parcel city, this week. And we'd be the council. Good job we've got understanding neighbours.

The local radio station seems to have the same fifty songs, on a shuffled loop or something. I could understand contemporary chart stuff, getting regular play but an obscure track from twenty two years ago, being played every Thursday and Friday? A conspiracy there. The people should be told!!


Oh, and by the way. The Caravan Of Doom is still there!

Still not got full 'net access restored so not posted in a while. So...

Standing outside work the other day, waiting to get in when I hear a mental 'mooing'. Now, I do work 'in the sticks' but the nearest field where cows would be kept, is over three quarters of a mile away. There was a lorry close by, with curtains drawn but it wasn't rocking so I doubt the driver was enjoying on man on cow fornication. Strange that.

Dad. You seriously need to ****ing calm down right now. Change the things that you can and accept the things you can't. Oh and stop bothering Mark and me.

Not really got a good vibe out of the last two writing classes. A bit disheartening, when classmates read out triple A, gold star material. You want to be happy for them but at the same time, a bitter streak of jealousy is revealed.

I hate Thursdays. Officially, factually and statistically, Monday is the busiest day of the week. BUT. It doesn't feel busy. Thursday is the second slowest day but feels the busiest. I hate that.
Just wanted to share that with you all.

Having router...and therefore internet...problems at the moment. I'm managing to post these in a brief lull between bouts of downtime. You should see the foul mood it puts my dad in.

Relax.

So, I was on the way back from work earlier today. The sun was shining and nature was in full bloom. The road was quiet but my music was not. I suddenly thought to myself, do you know what?

Things aren't so bad after all.

I was going to post up last night but I returned from the pub, a little worse for wear so decided not to. Have been trying to impart computer knowledge to my dad today. Then we took loads of pictures, trying to get just the right one for his dating profile. We ended up with the one below, where he's trying to look cool. Hmmm.

So my dad's starting to become more confident with a computer. That's a good thing.

Browsing eBayer like a professional waster. He's not allowed to bid on things though. Hard and fast rule. If you wants to bid, he must come see me first. I need my power fix and keeping him on a short cyber leash gives me just that.

Ah, life is good.

I feel ill.
:(

All weird and funny...that's funny, peculiar not funny, ha-ha.

Think I'll go rest up.

Here's the rather scary caravan in question, just near our driveway:

What's the strangest thing that's worried you? Right now, I'd have to say a caravan. You heard right, a caravan.
The caravan in case, just turned up in the street last Tuesday. Nobody saw it arrive and nobody has been back to it since it came. It has a grimy, eerie feel...you just get the feeling that it wouldn't look out of place, being towed by the truck from Jeepers Creepers.

I do have a picture but unfortunately, it looks like Blogger uploads aren't working at the minute.

Where did it come from? Has it been dropped off by passing aliens? Is it a pikey reconaissance mission? It's a creepy, creepy caravan. Maybe we can get the bin men to take it away tomorrow.

I'm alive!!!! Ha ha ha! No four month old trfile can defeat me!!! Mwahahaha!!

Not only am I still here but, guess what?....


MONEY, MONEY, MONEY, MONEY....MUUHH-NAAY!!!

You know what that means?

Food, glorious food!
Hot sausage and mustard!
While we're in the mood,
Cold jelly and custard!

Well, you know how the rest of that song goes.

I'm extremely glad actually. I don't think I would have the energy for dance class later, otherwise. Not to mention the money for the class itself. Of course.

Well, I've still not been paid. I also have cold, barefeet because I've had to eat my shoes. It's become so grim and desperate now, I'm onto expired desserts.

Unless I expire from food poisoning, I'll speak to you tomorrow.

Spent practically the entire day, switching the computers around at home. There's always that fear when you mess with stuff that it won't work again. Happily, everything does work fine.

Not been paid yet!! The house is low on food, can't afford to buy any more so I may be forced into eating my own shoes for sustinence, if the money isn't forthcoming.
Watch this space.

My legs ache from dance class last night. Also, after months of cold, 13C today feels 40C. Make it go away. Just give me sunny but brisk, and I'll be happy.

I blog, therefore I am. Apparently.

The first jewel of wisdom that I shall impart is DON'T work in customer services of some kind. It's the pits.

I wasted God knows how much of my life this morning trying to placate some w*****r, who seemed very adept at making black, white and wrong into right.

Hey, people in customer services are human too!!